Be Thou My Vision

The pathway is broken and the signs are unclear

And I don't know the reason that you brought me here

But just because You love me the way that You do

I'm going to walk through the valley if you want me to

'Cause I'm not who I was when I took my first step

and I'm clinging to the promise You're not through with me yet

So if all of these trials bring me closer to You

I will go through the fire if You want me to

It may not be the way I would have chosen

When you lead me through a world that's not my home

But You never said it would be easy

You only never said I'll never go alone

So when the whole world turns against me and I'm all by myself

and I can't hear you answer my cries for help

I'll remember the suffering your love put you through

and I will go through the valley if you want me to

-"Be Thou My Vision" Ginny Owens

Sometimes you encounter a situation in life that brings you down, makes you wonder how things got this way. I'm so thankful that I have a Lord that knows my heart, one who knows my every thought, fear and desire. I do not have to live up to a standard that the world has for me... only the one that my Savior has for me.  I have turned to this song an innumerable amount of times for comfort when I do not understand what God is putting me through.  I remember times sitting in my dorm room at Wellesley, just screaming out to God to help me through all the loneliness I felt there. I would listen to this song on repeat.  In the end, I saw why I was there and see what an amazing person that time shaped me to be. When my aunt died, my parents got divorced, we suffered through infertility, in tough situations at work... time and time again I came back to this song. After I am reminded that He will carry me through, He eventually always reveals his plan and makes good come from the situation.  So, while it always seems that I type these words through tears (I'm sure this song has made at leaset a few other appearances on this blog in the past four years), I know that soon the tears will pass and God will for my life will be revealed.  He has a plan for me that makes my life WORTH living, despite how silly or frivolous this world may see me as. <----sometimes I must remind myself of this several times in one day. 

And while "the whole world" may turn against me, this song also reminds me that God made a special person, perfect for me that he put in my life so that I won't have to live alone. William has stood with me for 9 and a half years and in some ways he's been there for thirteen.  I am always amazed by his love for me and my ability to love him.  William is the most supportive, well meaning, caring, God-fearing husband that I could ask for.  We were just kids when we fell in love, but our love has grown to something that no child would understand.  He loves me and Levi and puts us first always. He hurts when I hurt and rejoices when I rejoice.  And I love him as hard and well as I possibly can.  Yes, we stumble... but nothing is too big for us and our covenant with God.  That being said, our relationship is better than ever. I have been humbled by the way God has made our love grow over the past few weeks.  We are strong... and if you don't know this, then you don't know us.